We all know and love Ketchup, Mustard, Onion, and now Spicy Mustard. But unbeknownst to the core four, several frankenweenies have begun sprouting from the lab on Detroit and W 58th Street.

The newest creation, “Bacon-Fruit Loops-Fried Egg-Sauerkraut,” is set to debut at the next Guardians home game. It will be followed later this season by the equally ambitious “Beer Cheese-Peanut Butter-Pineapple.”

When asked to comment, Ketchup threw his hands up while mustard stared silently into space. According to The Pierogi’s top hot dog linguists, this roughly translates to: “Hope has truly abandoned us” …and “Send help.”

“The existence of the Fruit Loop and Hot Cheeto dog may serve to prove the absence of a benevolent God,” said Onion, with a comforting hand on the shoulder of the shell-shocked Mustard.